The Life of A Whistle

Crysalie, I Choose You! Go!

Thu, 07 Dec 2006 07:17:38 GMT

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So, I was browsing my little sister's LJ the other day and ran across this. It appears to be some sort of card fight that runs between people. Depending on how many people you beat, your level increases. I think it's sort of funny...

COMBAT CARDS 2.1

to fight crysalie
enter your username below

More of an actual update next time. And not an emo one. :P

-Crys

I'm So Tired!

Fri, 01 Dec 2006 04:25:52 GMT

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I'm so tired right now. Is anyone else getting tired of receiving e-mail messages? I think my brain is ready to explode, if it hasn't already. (Heck if I can tell at this point.) That's what I get for being a member of so many Yahoo! Inuyasha groups revolving around the Fanguild. But still...I'm beginning to hate checking my e-mail! Every single time I log in, I have like 80 messages built up. Partly because it's gotten to the point where I don't want to check my e-mail, so by putting it off build-up occurs. Gah!

Anyway, I guess I haven't been on this journal in a long time...I'm not exactly what you would call a faithful blogger. :P And for a while there, I was becoming a little burnt out on life. I don't know, I just kept escaping everything through a reading outlet. I read Interview With the Vampire by Anne Rice and another book called The Knight and the Rose. Both were good, I suppose. But neither was really my typical reading style. It was nice, however, to be able to read an actual book. I haven't had the opportunity to do that in a while.

*sigh* And despite my love for the series, I was becoming burnt out on Inuyasha. I love the series, but I suppose all the fanfiction and everything didn't inspire me for a while there. I was even considering resigning as moderator at the IYFG at one point. I think in part this was due to the fact that I was in this slump. I used to be so sure of myself and what I wanted to do in life. I wanted to teach...but now I'm not sure what I want out of life. I'm just so disgusted with many things surrounding me at this point. There are just so many to list and I don't have the energy to list them all now. >.<

On the bright side, I got an iPod nano! :D I was extremely happy about that! And my first credit card, ever! I have that, too, now.

-Crys

IYFG Quality Committee

Fri, 08 Sep 2006 15:36:03 GMT

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I know a certain someone already did this, but I figure I should represent... :P

The Inuyasha Fanguild, where I moderate, is currently looking for people interested in screening nominees. In general, we're just looking for people who are willing to weed through the nominations we receive each quarter and pinpoint the stories whose grammar, capitalization, presentation, and other mechanics of writing are such that should be DQ. We're trying to level the playing ground...

Anyway, we're in need of a few more individuals. So, if this sounds like something you would be interested in, apply! (You have to be a member of the IYFG, so if you aren't and you are interested, please join!) The following is the application, which can be sent to either Ren (inuraku5@aim.com) or me (crystal_whistle@yahoo.com), if you are more comfortable.

> Applicants will be asked follow-up questions. (The follow-up is a sample screening report for a couple of fics.)
>
> Name/Nick --
>
> CYA Statement -- (this is to say you're over 17, those under 17 can still apply but we can't have them read adult matterial)
>
> Are you an author? -- [If you're an author provide links to works you
> have written.]
>
> Are you a beta? -- [If you're a beta list authors and titles you have
> beta'ed with links.]
>
> Preferred Categories -- [List at least 2 but as many as possible and
> in the order of importance.]
>
> [A few paragraphs about who you are and why you want to be in the
> Quality Committee.]
>
> A major requirement of a screener is the ability to be unbiased, to
> treat each and every nomination equally regardless of its author, its
> pairings, etc. Are you willing to do this, even if you're assigned
> categories which were not within your preference? What are you willing
> to do to curtail whatever biases or preferences you might have?
>
> If a conflict of interest arises, would you be willing to screen the
> work of a fellow member of the QC? Would you be willing to submit a
> challenge if that work contains challengeable offenses? And if that
> work is DQ'ed, what would be your gut reaction?
>
> Another major requirement is time: do you foresee any difficulty
> obtaining the free time needed to screen nominations?
>
> Do you foresee problems with the system and if so what would be your
> solutions?

Thanks for hearing me out! :D

-Crys

And Life Continues...

Wed, 30 Aug 2006 08:45:36 GMT

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So...I really do still live. School started up again last Wednesday, and it seems like forever since I've actually been able to sit down and relax. I've either been: a) Running around in preparation for starting the fall semester at my university, b) Dealing with schedule changes, c) Working, or d) Showing my friends around campus/helping them out. For the past week, I haven't even really been on the computer...

And schedule changes were a nightmare! I swear, I think I changed my classes around like five or six times, just trying to achieve the perfect schedule. (And now I actually owe my university almost $300 because I added an extra class in the process...to where I am now taking 16 hours. Financial aid was already used up...)

Anyway, lately...my dreams have been unsettled. In the past two weeks, I've woken up, only to realize that I had dreamed about an old friend (who I haven't seen since New Year's Day). I only remember one dream, but every single time there's always this sense of lingering sorrow or guilt. It's hard to describe, I mean...I've done nothing wrong and yet these dreams always leave me feeling ashamed. I suppose what really bothers me is that I've known this friend since second grade...we fallowed each other to all the same public schools, and we remained in the same Girl Scout troop from second through eighth grade.

Most of my younger years, she was always there. I guess a part of me feels a sense of loss or responsibility for the severed bond we inevitably concluded our friendship with...sometimes I do find myself thinking that perhaps I could have (or should have) done more to save our friendship...but I always end up convincing myself otherwise. People inevitably change over time, no matter how we wish otherwise. To be perfectly honest, while I'm on this whole contemplative reverie, I should've seen this coming. Starting back in my Freshman year of high school, we were already drifting apart. By the time I reached my Senior year, I didn't really know much about her and she sure didn't know much of anything about me.

*rolls eyes* I swear, my mind is a strange place. It's as clumsy and ditzy as it is confusing and illogical.

I, my friends, am a strange person. The other day I had someone at work ask me if my boyfriend was abusing me because I have this huge fist-sized bruise on my arm, which I unintentionally inflicted on myself. I swear, at the rate I'm going people probably think I'm making everything up, when I'm not! :P (And you haven't even heard about the Jump Roping Incident. Have you ever heard of anyone spraining their ankle by jump roping?)

And now, I leave you with the following to amuse your curious minds...

And I leave everyone with this...which I pilfered from abraxas_ren, who snatched it from emmie_chan849.

I want whoever who reads this to ask me 4 questions. Any 4, no matter how dirty or random. I have to answer them honestly. In turn, you have to post this message in your own journal, and you have to answer the questions that are asked of you.

-Crys

P.S. Do forgive me if my words are unlegible or you had to endure senseless babble, I should have been in bed, sleeping, hours ago. Hmmm...oops?

The Floral Cooler Incident

Sat, 12 Aug 2006 06:48:53 GMT

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I realized today that I have officially reached a new low in my life. Don't get me wrong, avoiding things can be healthy and are necessary to a certain extent, but I think one must draw the line when they proceed to hide in a floral cooler.

Okay, let me backtrack for a moment and explain a few things.

About mid-June, I started a new job in the bakery of my local grocery store. Things were going well, I was finally getting the hang of my job, and then a big atomic bomb planted itself right in the middle of my work in the form of a guy named Billy.

Now, in order to understand the event that lead to this recent 'floral cooler' incident, I must explain a few things about myself. I'm not like a lot of people. I was raised in a very protective, restrictive environment. Thus, whereas most nineteen year old girls have probably experienced parties, alcohol, drugs, sex, and even had a list of boyfriends (or at least one of the previously listed things), I have not. I'm a virgin in every since of the word-- eyes, ears, body, and soul. I have never had a boyfriend. I have never kissed anyone. Obviously, this means I have never had sex either. In fact, the closest I've gotten to somewhat knowing what is involved in the process is fanfiction lemons. And it took me months before I could read those without blushing or feeling guilty. For the most part I'm Kagome, schoolgirl in every since of the word.

And believe me when I say, I hit a rough period where I felt inadequate in many ways because of my upbringing. Just imagine what it was like entering college last fall for me? Now that wrecked havic on my mental state and self-esteem, in itself. For months I couldn't stop myself from gazing around and thinking, 'All these people are probably so different than me, into parties and all that other stuff. No one around here is like me...I'm alone on this college campus.' I even used to get depressed because I had no boyfriend, wanted someone to love me like that, and probably would never have one.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make here is that I am not familiar with the whole dating process nor having guys around. It's okay if guys want to be friends, but once they overstep the 'friend' intention, an inner alarm goes off within my head. The process always goes as follows: A) Become friends. B) Daydream over whether the guy could be potential boyfriend material. C) Discard idea after personality traits conflict with my morals. If the guy has an interest in me and it's not just wishful thinking on my part, the next step is fulfilled: D) Guy steps across 'friend' line, I become uneasy, scared even, and quickly I instigate the avoidance tactic. Cutting him out of my life all together. Essentially I'm running from the issue.

Now, keep in mind the above is for guys I originally knew. Imagine if it was for someone I didn't know from the start, or don't know that well? Things are much worse in that case.

Thus, we head back toward my original topic that lead to the floral cooler incident today. For a recap: I started working, things were going fine, and then Billy drops a bomb in my lap.

What happened was...the day we meet, he's stocking beer. (He works in Grocery, which is just stocking all the food/beverage articles they sell in the store.) I noticed someone left a bottle of beer on one of my bakery tables, so seeing how it bugs me when things aren't in their proper place, I kindly proceed to return it to its home. I pass him on my way, as he is stocking things on the same isle I'm heading. He jokes about how I shouldn't be drinking that, I tell him I've never had a sip of alcohol (and I'm not even old enough yet). Then, he asks how old I am. Now obviously when he found out I was close to his age, little lightbulbs went off in his head. Hours later, as I'm in the back retreiving boxes from the freezer, he catches me and asks if he can have my phone number. "To get to know one another better, and become friends", he said.

'Leave me alone!' my mind was screaming. I swear, my heart was beating so fast and I was seriously uncomfortable. Anyway, as things turned out, I ended up reluctantly telling him that I would have to think about it. He originally wanted to give me his number when it became obvious I didn't really want to give him mine. But as I departed, a jolly 'I'm patient', was his reply.

Pretty much what ended up going down was, the next day he approached me and asked again for my number. Straight off the bat I told him no and that I pretty much didn't want anything to do with him. His response was basically 'I'm patient, I'll keep trying'. Thus, I told my managers. They claimed it was harassment, and promptly told him to leave me alone. (I'm not really sure what exactly they told him...)

So, today, my 'new low' consisted of me hiding in a floral cooler for fifteen minutes, waiting for Billy to leave the back area I had been in. I no longer feel like meeting him face to face, and in my effort to avoid him and run away from the situation, I stayed in the cooler in wait.

Like I said, I've reached a new low. Avoidance has been taken too far this time, but I don't know how to cure myself from this problem. Amazingly enough, for those who've read Del Kaidin's Broadway Bound, the part where Kagome's mother claims her daughter has a phobia of love and commitment hit a string in me long ago. I seriously think that describes me perfectly.

*shakes head* I'm so pathetic. Do me a favor, and please don't act any different around me since I've revealed all this? I hate it when I reveal my inner-most traits/feelings and people start walking on egg-shells because I'm essentially 'pure'. Whatever. I just want to be treated like everyone else...

-Crys

One-shot Challenge and Stuff...

Fri, 11 Aug 2006 06:19:51 GMT

__________________________

So, I figure I better go ahead and update this thing again with an actual post. I don't really consider that last post a real post. All I did was gripe, after all. :P

I've been working on a one-shot challenge for SublimeTrickster based on an image she drew. Only thing is...I have issues keeping things short. The thing is only half way finished and it's 15 pages in length (roughly 6,900 words). Even more troublesom is the fact that I'm making super slow progress due to my perfectionist tendencies. Every time I sit down to work on the thing, I wind up backtracking. Inevitably the material already written is edited, again.

*sweatdrops* I guess I'm just sort of anxious about this thing. I'm writing it from Inuyasha's POV, so I'm trying to make him sound believable and still get the point across. Plus, I keep changing the title...first it was called "Nobody Knows". Then I changed it to "Sealed Within Thy Heart", and now it's "Quite Quintessential". I think I like the current title the best. Unusual, you know?

Anyway, I'm so astounded! I found out today that I only work 14 hours next week. The entire time I've had my job, I've never worked less than 32 hours in one week. I'm so happy! Maybe I'll actually get something accomplished for a change?

And now I will grace you with something: I have to admit, I have this weird...thing that I find annoying. I cannot have anything on the left-hand side of the computer. At all. It bugs me to the point that I have to move whatever is there. I don't know why...I guess it's just one of those things that's weird about me. Of course, this is coming from someone who doesn't mind drinking warm water. (Yes, laugh at me. I know you want to!) And I can't stand bracelets, yet I wear a watch daily. How funny is that?

Oh, well...hope all my friends are doing well! ^_^ Take care!

-Crys

Birthday Bashes

Sun, 16 Jul 2006 18:25:50 GMT

_____________________________

Guess, what? As of 9 o'clock CST I turned 19 years old. ;) And my mother turned 48 years old. (Yes, you read right. I was born on my mother's birthday.)

Anyway, my mom, little sis (Steff), Bianca (a friend), and I did a few things. The main attraction was paying a visit to the local movie theater to see Click. It was very good, I highly recommend it to anyone who wants, or needs, a laugh. We ate lunch at the food court in the mall...visited some flower place that was drenched in the area's history. (It was so cool...there were some old buildings on the property that were moved from their original locations. Ex. One-room school house, old fashioned black smith's workshop, old well, etc.) And that's about it. The day turned out okay, although it could have been better...

Mother, Dad, and my older sister, Brandy, have been going at it. Brandy's whole family is pretty much angry with my mom and they refuse to really talk to each other...the worst part is I fear the reprecussions headed straight toward us. Apparently Brandy's kids were forced to call Mom to tell her happy birthday and Mom didn't take that so well. She claims she doesn't want anything to do with Brandy or her family any more.

*sighs* It's a huge mess...and I can see how both sides are in the wrong, but I'm staying safely neutral at this point.

Well, back to work tomorrow...hopefully this week should prove the last week I'm forced to work full-time! *crosses fingers*

-Crys

Long Time...Much Work.

Fri, 14 Jul 2006 06:09:11 GMT

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Wow...it's been like ages since I've updated this thing! (Oops!) The main story behind this being that I've been busy with the Recommendation List, then I was busy with the Nomination Report for a while. Not to mention, I recently started a job a week or two ago. I'm working in the bakery of a grocery store...and let me tell ya, be kind to the bakery workers! All they do all day is place pre-packaged dough onto pans so they can be cooked for your pleasure. Not to mention, I was hired for part-time work, but apparently we're short two employees...one person is on vacation and another one was rushed to the hospital, so no longer is able to work. I've been having to work full-time lately, my hours 12-8:30pm. When I get home, I'm exhausted and pretty much all I want is to hit the sack.

I recently made a hefty purchase at my local bookstore. My first check I placed half into my savings account (for college text books), then went and splurged on Inuyasha managa...since Fenik told me about quite a few differences between the anime and manga. I'm still reading them, but I'm really surprised at some of the events they altered for the anime. I had no idea! And some of the things...it makes no sense why they changed them, or left out the details. *rolls eyes* I'm looking forward to August, when the next Fruits Basket manga comes out...I'll have to make another trip to the bookstore then. ^_^

Anyway, that's about it...I'm happy, I'm off on Sunday! Guess what Sunday is, moi's birthday!

And on another note, Mother is starting to become annoying. She's badgering me about getting a boyfriend...which reminds me, I recently had a weird, uncomfortable experience at work. Some guy kept bugging me...he wanted my phone number when I knew nothing about him. When I flat out refused, he was just like 'Well, okay. I'll still try. I'm a patient guy. I'm not a bad person.' Uh, yeah...well, he may say that but I don't know anything about him! And I wasn't willing to find out...

-Crys

Fic Challenges

Fri, 23 Jun 2006 02:56:31 GMT

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So, I have sold my soul in pledging to write a one-shot fic challenge for Sublimetrickster. I am to write something that contains the reference of this as one of the scenes.

Oh, and then there is the following, which I am supposed to finish within 2 years, but we all know that that is an utterly impossible timeline for me. The challenge was actually initiated by chibi_inu13, if anyone's curious...

001.	Fur coat.	002.	Persistance.	003.	5 Senses	004.	Unrequited	005.	“Kiss me or I’ll kill you”
006.	“That boy's about as smart as a bag of hammers”	007.	Temptation	008.	Forbidden	009.	Split Personality	010.	Instinct
011.	Desire	012.	Fetish	013.	List (Coming Soon)	014.	Zodiac	015.	Forgive/Forget (Coming Soon)
016.	Obsession	017.	Bad Day	018.	Delusion	019.	“Can I change your mind?”	020.	Under the table
021.	Jinx	022.	Whisper	023.	Bright	024.	Reflection	025.	Selfish
026.	“I would, I could, but I can’t”	027.	Time	028.	Caught in the act	029.	Chocolate Chip Cookie [link]	030.	Popcorn
031.	“I love you/but I hate you”	032.	Last chance	033.	Trial and Error	034.	Addiction	035.	Mistakes
036.	Repetitive	037.	Tomato Red	038.	Childhood Memories	039.	Here we go again…	040.	First Kiss
041.	Laying it on Thick	042.	On One Condition	043.	Goodbye/Goodnight	044.	“Spread’em”	045.	Hero Worship
046.	Till death do us part	047.	No More Words	048.	Denial	049.	Contradiction	050.	The Last Resort
051.	Pillow Fight	052.	Stained windows and Chipped paint	053.	Mind Game	054.	Fashion Police	055.	Say it ain’t so
056.	Monkey Business	057.	Cold Feet	058.	Vending Machine	059.	You know you love me	060.	Dirty Little Secret
061.	Slip of the Tongue	062.	I will remember you	063.	Don’t think, just feel	064.	“Shut up and kiss me”	065.	Drama Queen
066.	Nice day for a funeral	067.	This is only a test	068.	Edge	069.	Pen and Paper	070.	I wish I had better news for you
071.	Once more with feeling	072.	Dominate/Submit	073.	Inferiority Complex	074.	“Next time, don’t be so rough”	075.	Mistaken Identity
076.	Dare	077.	Is that supposed to be a colour?	078.	You want me to put that where?	079.	Is this appropriate at our age?	080.	False Alarm
081.	Second Chance	082.	“Say ah….”	083.	Commitment Issues	084.	“Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts…”	085.	Spin the bottle
086.	Power outage	087.	Long, hot shower	088.	Public Transportation	089.	To the victor goes the spoils	090.	Voyeur
091.	It Broke	092.	Third times the charm	093.	Cool Water	094.	Warm Sunshine	095.	A brightly coloured parrot
096.	Cherry Red	097.	“…And they lived happily ever after”	098.	Orange Popsicle’s	099.	Raking Leaves	100.	“Say that again?”

THE KEY:
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

#IY	Pairing: Inutaisho/Izayoi
#IY	Pairing: Inuyasha/Kagome
#IY	Pairing: Koga/Ayame
#IY	Pairing: Miroku/Sango
#IY	Pairing: Sesshomaru/Kagura
#IY	Pairing: Sesshomaru/Rin

Yes, let the torture begin...

-Crys

MIA

Tue, 20 Jun 2006 22:59:33 GMT

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Whoo! I finally got a job...going back to H-E-B, only this time I'm working in the bakery instead of up front having to bag and do carryouts. (And I swore I'd never work at H-E-B again once I quit last year.)

Anyways, I'm alive...I sort of had this seperation blockade from the computer for a week and a half or so. The source being a few novels I was reading, which caused my interest with the computer to diminish. See, when I read books, I pretty much read them straight through. I spend practically all my free time reading until I either finish the book or move on to another one. So, A Great and Terrible Beauty and Rebel Angels by Libba Bray were finished, promptly followed by Lord of Snow and Shadows by Sarah Ash. They each took me about three days on average to finish, maybe less depending on if I was able to just lounge around and not do anything.

And...that's about it.

Oh, no it isn't! My fanfic actually has fanart now! Varethane drew me a pretty pic of Rune! *Bows to her great artistic skills* Rune--> [Link]

-Crys

Yahoo! Groups

Tue, 13 Jun 2006 05:31:12 GMT

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I swear, I'm going to scream soon! That stupid virus going through the Yahoo! Groups has taken over my e-mail box and I don't know how to get it to stop. Messages keep popping up in my inbox saying crystal_whistle@yahoo.com has moderated messages sent to her groups.

I haven't sent anything! Grr...

I even scanned my computer using Norton Anti-Virus three times earlier. I'm at a loss as how to fix this problem. And I'm embarrassed that I was hit and it keeps sending out messages from me.

*Screams*

-Crys

Woe Be the Homeland...

Fri, 09 Jun 2006 22:41:25 GMT

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So, life's been hectic lately and definitely not desirable. Had a cry fest the other day. My mother's becoming quite frustrated at my lack of employment. Her deluded mind thinks I haven't been searching, when the fact is I have. I've turned in like nine applications, starting back in May. No one called me. Is that really my fault? It's not exactly like I can waltz up to the manager and say, "Hey, the name's Crystal! I'm a hard worker, and desperately need a job. Hire me, I'm the best there is...what you will? Great!"

Whatever...looks like things are actually looking up. I used to work at H-E-B (for those who don't know, it's a grocery store), but quit. It was messed up, the managers refused to grant me my high school graduation day off, plus another day I desperately needed. I could have handled the field trip day, but graduation? It's not my fault most of the workers are teens and the alotted twenty day-off requests were used up. I put in my request as soon as I could!

Anyway...so, my big sis is a manager and just transferred to a new branch. I'm set up for an interview for possible employment in the bakery. *Crossed fingers* Hopefully it'll work out...my mother keeps threatening me, saying if I don't work this summer I won't have money for my textbooks.

Now, moving on. My family is weird and we have problems (many in fact, but I'm referring to an isolated case here). My little sis, mother, and father are on shaky ground. Currently I'm the only one on speaking terms with everyone in the house. Steffanie is 17 years old and been begging my parents to start drivers ed. So, they planned on doing the parent taught course, like I did. Only Steff really didn't want to learn from my dad, so my mom registers my little sis at the local Austin Driver's School the other day. Breaks the news to dad (who was going to teach her the instructional part) and he got upset. He's acting rather childish about it, actually. He refuses to talk to either my little sis or mom, even when they tried to discuss the situation.

Personally, I think his feelings are hurt, but even that's a stupid reason to act like a five year old who had his candy taken away. He even ran into my mom's room and claimed he has a year to live...and he was taking mom and Steff off of his list of beneficiaries. (I don't know if this is true, but I'm hoping not...)

So, our household has brick walls built around the rooms. It's like everyone (aside myself) is separated by the Great Wall of China.

So...other than that, I've been working on the task of updating that dang Recommendations List. I swear, someone sent in fourty-four recs at once...I'm still trying to catch up...

You know, I was reading one of the recs on the list, and it really stirred my mind into action. I love the whole 'Inuyasha-and-Kagome-have-known-each-other-since-childhood' plotlines. I've read many myself. But somehow, after so long, they all just seem to blur together until every story written around the idea is the same as the next. It's hard to find an original one nowadays, which makes me sad...'cause I find the idea extremely sweet. *sigh* One day, I want to tackle the concept and build a more original plotline around it. Perhaps, even mixing the idea with an AR plotline...though, I wouldn't dare tackle it now. I'm afraid my attempt would probably pale in comparison to the Great and Mighty Fenik. Plus, I'm concentrating on ALD, which I am super slow at writing...

Well...that's about it for now. Problems, problems, thoughts, and more problems...

Pray for me people! Or send a pixie to my house, or something...please!

-Crys

Dreams of Weirdness

Thu, 01 Jun 2006 18:08:11 GMT

__________________________

Ever have one of those nights where you wake up and you can't help but think "what the hell?"

Yeah...that was last night. I wake up this morning and apparently I actually dreamed last night, which is somewhat rare for me. I'm not sure why, but I usually don't remember my dreams. *shrugs* Anyway...moving on. I had the weirdest dream, in which paynesgrey, _midoriko_sama_, and del_kaidin and I were in a special group. I can't be 100% sure, but I think we were the only members of the Definitions Committe for the IYFG. Somehow I had been invited to join with them.

So, somehow quirkyslayer and Midoriko-sama were talking about me on the thread, and it wasn't entirely good. It was weird, like I was watching them, hovering over their keyboards typing up what they wanted to say. Then once I was through with my whole out-of-body experience, I responded to their somewhat disheartening comments...basically they didn't believe I was good enough for the committee and had serious doubts on how trustworthy I really was.

Anyway, the whole dream was weird. I don't even talk to any of them (except for Del occasionally) and I'm definitely not on any definitions committee with them!

Very weird, very weird indeed...I seriously wonder what they would say if they knew I was having awkward dreams about them. :P

-Crys

P.S. June is here! June is here! You know what that means? My birthday's only a month and a half away! ^_^

And Then Rain Fell...

Tue, 30 May 2006 19:54:05 GMT

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Yesterday was one of the worst days I've ever had. Literally. My mom got on my case because I hate driving, telling me that if I don't plan to ever drive the car, she could sell it. Somehow we went from discussing that to my future and how evidentally my mom is having problems with me, when she thought I'd be the last one she would. From there things just kind of spiraled out of control...

And I cried. She left angry, to go drive my little sis to drop off her job applications. I went to change, put my shoes on...and I was about to just walk out the door, to clear my head, when my dad says to let him know if my brother calls the home-line. So, I couldn't leave. I ended up waiting ten minutes or so, then quietly crept outside to visit with my dogs. (When I'm sad, I love going outside and just sitting with them, it helps me calm down and think things through usually.)

I stayed with them for a while, then I ended up on our covered patio, laying down in a torn lawnmower box, crying again. Mom and Steff tried to get me to come inside, but I didn't budge. After a while of just laying there, I ended up finally coming in, grabbing a blanket from my room, and heading towards my old room I had when I was a little kid.

And there I lay for a good half-hour, crying my eyes out and being utterly depressed over my non-existent happy future and personal issues I thought had been cleared up long ago, but apparently have not.

So, yeah...wasn't exactly a walk in the park.

*clears throat* Anyways, things are better now. Actually, I thought it was funny because my older sister, Brandy, she's a really religious Christian-- She won't even allow her kids to celebrate Halloween because she says it's evil-- apparently watched a news segment on 20/20. Evidentally, through backmasking certain songs you can hear hidden messages (which are supposed to be evil according to my big sis, but I don't entirely believe that). So, Steff and I were exploring and apparently in "The Nightmare Before Christmas" one of the creatures says 'Here comes Jack'. Reversed, it sounds like 'Ass Muffin'!

I cracked up laughing. :P I'm not sure if that was intentional or purely accidental...but its amusing either way!

-Crys

The Lazy Days

Fri, 26 May 2006 00:28:42 GMT

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Ahh...I feel so incredibly lazy, as if I haven't accomplished much of anything lately. Well, I suppose posting the first chapter of ALD is something, but the second chapter has not been touched for a few days...

See...I was reading 'Thousandfurs', an IYFG nominee. I thought it was interesting, though I found it hard to get into since the fairy tale has already been Inuyasha-ized by Sublimetrickster in her 'Dog Skin'. Either way, the story caused me to have an unexplainable addiction to fairy tales, the authentic ones. I read Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, and a whole bunch of odd ones. I think the weirdest one I found was about this boy whose step-mother chopped off his head with a trunk. She set him on a chair, tied his head on, and placed a half-eaten apple in his hand. She told her little girl to whack him in the ears if he didn't give her a bite of the apple. She did and starts freaking out, crying. She thinks she killed her brother. Anyway...so it gets weirder, but pretty much the boy's father unknowingly eats him, he somehow is turned into a bird, and at the end his step-mother dies and he comes back to life.

Yes, it was very weird...

I was sick with some sort of stomach ache a few days ago. I spent practically the whole day sleeping. And with my unwell stomach stirring me on, I wrote the following. Ignore any errors or stupidity...I was sick. I might as well post it here to remember. :P

QUIXOTIC

Kagome Higurashi was the type of girl who took every relationship, whether romantic or platonic, seriously. Laying in bed, drowsy but unable to sleep, brows scrunched together in thought, a plan formulated in the recess of her mind. She was utterly appalled by the audacity of some people. This would simply not do; a lecture was in due order. Who better to give it than herself?

Of course, that had been over a week ago. He wasn’t easy to hunt down after all, nor was it easy to escape Inuyasha for even the briefest length of time; the hanyou had an exceptionally powerful nose.

Strangely, this situation she found herself in reminded her of a similar time when Kikyo and herself had found themselves confined to a cave, though the circumstances had proved more dangerous. Kikyo’s life had hung in the balance.

“Miko, why do you stare?” His deep baritone voice reverberated slightly through the damp cave, his tone demanding. His cool demeanor and presence exuded his regal status, the aristocratic robes and armor he wore complementing the white thing wrapped over his shoulder. Kagome couldn’t help stare, it was ridiculously long and hideous, not fashionable in the least. It reminded her of an elephant’s trunk, only really, really hairy…What Not To Wear seriously needed contacting.

His amber eyes flashed threateningly when the expected answer never came.

Kagome flipped her raven locks over her shoulder, steering herself to broach the discussion with the mighty Lord of the West. Leaning against the wall, arms crossed in a similar fashion to her beloved hanyou, brown eyes serious, she cleared her throat. She refused to be intimidated, instead meeting his cool gaze steadily. “Okay, let’s get something straight. I’m starting to become really annoyed. You, Sesshomaru, Sessy, Fluffy, whatever name you’re called, need to listen carefully for the next hour or so. I’m going to set you straight, these quixotic tendencies are a bit much.”

Stare. She couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but she would not loose her nerve. All his stares looked relatively similar.

“Alright, glad we have that cleared up!” The school-girl clapped her hands together, eyes trained on the regal lord standing tall and proud across from her. Wow…someone needs some Prozac. She shook her thoughts away. “Alright, look I understand that perhaps you have some urges being male and all. I mean, testosterone does have that affect…but seriously, we need to discuss your relationship endeavors.”

She could be wrong, but did he twitch? No? Alright…

“How can I put this without seeming insensitive…” The girl rubbed her chin thoughtfully, looking idly toward the ceiling. Glancing at the unmoving lord before her, she dropped the hand. “Things just won’t work out between us. I’m sorry, but cold lords with missing limbs aren’t my style. Sure, prosthetics have advanced in the modern era, but imagine me grabbing your hand, only for the limb to become detached! Besides, knowing you, you’d think yourself too high and mighty to leave the thing in the corner while you sleep. I’m sorry, but I really don’t need back problems so young. Waking up to find myself laying on the detached limb would be worse than receiving a kiss from that nasty thing you call your servant!”

Okay, maybe not…Kagome gagged at the thought.

“And seriously, how could you ever think something could go on between us? I’m sorry, but I have serious doubts of your masculinity…are you sure you and Naraku don’t have something going on? Maybe he wanted more from you that one time you agreed to help him…both of you do wear eye shadow. Ever heard of the Fashion Police? I think that’s a no-no…plus, I’m only fifteen! Please, if I wanted to hook up with someone, don’t you think I’d want someone my own age? What are you, 400 years old or something?”

“I loose count,” he replied indifferently.

“Uhuh…right. So, you have Alzheimer’s. And you expect me to want you? Excuse me, but I’d like someone who’s bound to remember my birthday. Plus, imagine me introducing you to my friends in the modern era. ‘Yeah, so this is my boyfriend. Isn‘t it so cool, he‘s so old! I mean, at least this way I won‘t have to worry about him wanting younger girls, I‘m way younger than him!’”

Stare.

“And, please, to think I would actually screw you! My eyes would bleed! No telling what kind of nasty fungus grows under those robes of yours!”

“Algae, actually. Mold, too. Jaken says he likes the smell.”

Kagome covered her mouth, trying to desperately not throw up her breakfast from this morning. He’s serious? I was just making something up! Oh…I think I’m going to puke…

Once she had composed herself, the time-traveler couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “Well, Jaken’s an idiot…he probably just doesn’t want to deal with it…no telling what kind of stench that carries.” Kagome’s face twisted in an attempt to not gag. “Anyway, that point aside…you are not my type and never will be. I would never screw you! I don’t want to be your mate. So you can throw that idea out the door!”

“Rin?”

Yeah...so I never finished it. I'm not sure this will ever be finished. :P I was mainly just using this as my way of venting my frustrations in regard to Sesshomaru/Kagome pairings. I so cannot stand them...and I started accidentally reading one yesterday. O_O

So, IYFG voting will end in a few days. That means the whopper recommendation file will need to be dealt with soon. Hopefully I can accomplish something before then, otherwise everything will inevitably need to be placed on haitus.

-Crys

Instant Messengers: Dangerous To Health

Mon, 15 May 2006 17:24:29 GMT

_______________________

I'm seriously debating...why are guys on Yahoo! IM suddenly swarming to me like a moth to a flame?

Seriously, this is really starting to bug me...about a month ago I had two guys IM me out of no where. One just wanted to have some 'fun' as he put it. I thought it was extremely disgusting and rude for him to look for a sex buddy online. I was not amused in the least. The second guy said he wanted a real relationship. Then last night I had some guy in my area IM me asking if I cared to chat. The conversation came to a standstill when he asked me 'How far have you gone with a guy?'...

So, why are all these guys suddenly messenging me!

Hopefully I fixed the problem. Apparently my public profile on Yahoo! was listed on the online member directory. I believe this was the reason for all of my incidents...so I will cross my fingers and hope that was the case. I'm getting sick of entertaining horny guys looking to hook up online. Augh!

Anyway...I did get my Inuyasha DVDs back, which I'm immensely happy about. :) And I traded in a few PS2 games and a DVD to a game shop. I received just enough money back to buy a manga. I bought Inuyasha Vol. 2, since mostly I only follow the anime and I someday hope to own the collection of manga. I'd like to be able to see all the differences from the anime from the manga, ya know? :P

Apparently in vol. 2, Yura has two arms ripped off, gushing blood, something we aren't privy to in the anime. And Sesshomaru doesn't just extract their father's grave-hidden-in-the-marble from Inuyasha's eye. No, he gouges into Inu's eye, blood is dripping from the said appendenge, as well as Sesshomaru's fingers.

Surprised me, that did! :P Eh, oh well...no brotherly love, ya know?

-Crys

DVDs

Fri, 12 May 2006 02:50:04 GMT

________________________________

I've had to deal with a jerk the last few days. I lent him my Inuyasha DVDs because he said he'd lend me his Cowboy Bebop ones if I did. Finished the Cowboy Bebop ones and yet I was still trading the Inuyasha ones with him. So, school was set to end today and I had told him over a week and a half ago I wanted them back before then.

I thought I had made myself perfectly clear.

So, he fed me bull I found hard to believe. I was supposed to meet him the Thursday before last to get them. He stood me up. When I messaged him about it, he replied he ended up coming into town late the night before and sleeping until 5pm. From the sounds of it that translated to: "Yeah, so I went out partying the night before I was supposed to swap you. I really didn't care we were supposed to swap, the responsible thing would have been letting you know I wouldn't meet you in advance, but hey, what did I care? I was too busy getting wasted off my ass! What a night!"

I was extremely irritated and fed up with him so I messaged him, probably using a tone a little more forceful than necessary...but still. I wanted to get my point across. So, he finally agrees, but then turns into an 'ice-man', cold as the Anarctic with me.

I went ahead and apologized to him for the tone I used, but I don't think I was in the wrong. He was the jerk who refused to do the responsible, adult thing and keep his promises. At the very least he could have worked with me more. He acted like he just didn't care when I got them, even though he claimed otherwise.

I finally received them today.

I am never lending out my Inuyasha DVDs to someone I don't know that well EVER again!

On a good note...I'm finished with finals and this year at Texas State University as of today! :D

-Crys

Oh. My.

Thu, 11 May 2006 22:28:23 GMT

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Oh, my freakin'...I just found Libba Bray, the author of "A Great and Terrible Beauty" on LiveJournal! I love that book! She barely had the sequal come out a few months ago, and I've been unable to read it because of school and other things going on. I can't believe this...I swear, this must seem like a blonde moment or something...

But, dang! I love her work! :D

libba_bray

*Happiness*

-Crys

Doll Dilemma

Thu, 11 May 2006 21:53:01 GMT

________________________________

I'm kind of annoyed right now. My friend Bianca is apparently upset with my little sis, Steffanie, and me because we commented that a doll she liked looked like Michael Jackson. And it did, thus why we pointed it out...but she's being so petty and ridiculous about the situation! We didn't even mean it in a bad way, and I guess, yeah, looking at it from another's view point it could seem criticizing or insulting...but it wasn't meant that way at all. And to be upset over a stupid doll, that's just petty to me!

Steffanie believes Bianca's purposely ignoring her posts now because of the situation. I swear, I really feel like telling her off or at least telling her to grow up and stop acting so childish! It's a freakin' doll, its importance in life is so minimal. I'm sorry if we inadvertingly hurt her feelings over a doll but she needs to get over it. Hey, I'm sure Michael Jackson's over the fact that people point at his nose all the time, you know?

Some people just take things too personally.

So, Steff sent Bianca an e-mail apologizing last night. I checked this morning and apparently the post has been deleted. I swear, if I wasn't ranting here I might explode on her, whether online or in real life.

Some people are just so irritating to deal with...

-Crys

Spam or No?

Thu, 04 May 2006 03:40:29 GMT

____________________________

So, I'm supposed to be studying for a final exam...but I'm not, obviously.

I did a very bad thing today. I was sent a message stating the following:

Read carefully,

THIS TOOK TWO PAGES OF THE TUESDAY USA TODAY - IT IS FOR REAL

To all of my friends, I do not usually forward messages,
But this is from my friend Pearlas Sandborn and she really is
an attorney.

If she says that this will work - It will work. After all,What have
you got to lose?

SORRY EVERYBODY.. JUST HAD TO TAKE THE CHANCE!!! I'm an
attorney, And I know the law. This thing is for real. Rest assured
AOL and &nbs p; Intel will follow through with their promises for
fear of facing a multimillion-dollar class action suit similar to the one
filed by PepsiCo against General Electric not too long ago.

Dear Friends; Please do not take this for a junk letter.
Bill Gates sharing his fortune. If you ignore this, You will repent
later.

Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies
and in an effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the
most widely used program, Microsoft and AOL are running an e-mail
beta test.

When you forward this e-mail to friends, Microsoft can and will
track it (If you are a Microsoft Windows user) For a two weeks
time period.

For every person that you forward this e-mail to, Microsoft will pay
you $245.00 For every person that you sent it to that forwards it on,
Microsoft will pay you $243.00 and for every third person that receives
it, You will be paid $241.00. Within two weeks, Microsoft will contact
you for your address and then send you a check.

Regards. Charles S Bailey General Manager Field Operations
1-800-842-2332 Ext. 1085 or 904-1085 or RNX 292-1085
[ mailto:Charles_Bailey@csx.com ] Charles_Bailey@csx.com

[ mailto:Charles_bailey@csx.com ] Charles_bailey@csx.com

thought this was a scam myself, But two weeks after receiving this
e-mail and forwarding it on. Microsoft contacted me for my address and
within days, I received a check for $24,800.00. You need to respond
before the beta testing is over. If anyone can affoard this, Bill gates is the
man.

It's all marketing expense to him. Please forward this to as many
people as possible. You are bound to get at least $10,000.00
We're not going to help them out with their e-mail beta test without
getting a little something for our time. My brother's girlfriend got in
on this a few months ago. When i went to visit him for the Baylor/UT
game. She showed me her check. It was for the sum of $4,324.44 and was stamped
"Paid
in full"

Like i said before, I know the law, and this is for real.

Now...normally, I'm not one to believe junk like this, but just because I didn't want to pass up the opportunity if it was real, I sent out a dozen or so e-mails. Thing is I didn't know anyone, so I just tracked down random people's e-mails and sent it through. Got two replies back, obviously the people were furious with me for sending this. One called me the F-word, and another girl sent me a reply I didn't even bother to read. Man, I'm never doing this again! It's so not worth the trouble! T_T

-Crys

ALD Chapter 1: Complete

Mon, 01 May 2006 05:45:58 GMT

_______________________________

Wow...finally finished first chapter of ALD! Crys is super happy right now! Now, if only my beta will send it back saying it's good to go, I'll be enthusiastic!

-Crys

Movie Theaters and Mugs

Sun, 30 Apr 2006 19:15:11 GMT

I had the weirdest dream last night! (I'm surprised I actually dreamed...)

Okay, so apparently me and my family were attending a wedding. I'm not absolutely sure, but I think it was at Brandy, my big sister's church. Then somehow the dream shifted and the place turned into a movie theater, where when you ordered a drink, they supplied them in mugs and in the back you returned them through a small window. Apparently, while I was at the theater I had children, a little boy and a baby, and a husband. (I was already married at the wedding.) I remember them showing a movie we were both concerned innapropriate for the little boy, so I took him and along with another man, my brother I think, we moved further back. Now, this would seem like a strange thing, except the further back you went, depending on what seat you chose, it displayed a different movie to your eyes. However, the system glitched and the employees alerted everyone the theater was closing. So, everyone made their way back to the mug window and left. However, when I arrived to the window they took my mug! It was my mug (it had a snowman on it), my sister Brandy had bought it for me, along with a previous one. They mistook both as the theater's property and for some reason I couldn't protest them taking the mug from me because they wouldn't listen. So, I retrieved Brandy and she argued with the manager (who the workers had had to call for), and finally they retrieve both of my mugs. The first one was broken in half, however...

And that's about all I remember.

And I know that it's said only the person dreaming can analyze the dream, but just for fun, I love looking dream elements up, so here's the results:

I. Children
To see children in your dream, signifies your own childlike qualities or a retreat back to a childlike state. It is an extension of your inner child during a time of innocence, purity, simplicity, and a carefree attitude. You may be longing for the past and the chance to satisfy repressed desires and unfulfilled hopes. Take some time off and cater to the inner child within.

II. Marriage
To see a marriage in your dream, signifies commitment, harmony or transition. You will undergo an important developmental transitional phase. It may also represent the unification of formerly separate or opposite aspects of yourself. In particular, it may represent the union of masculine or feminine aspects of yourself.

III. Husband
To dream that you have a husband (but you do not in your waking life), symbolizes some sort of partnership and/or commitment. Often, it is also representative of the qualities of your father in which you projected onto this figure or the masculine side of your own personality.

IV. Movie Theater
To dream that you are in a movie theater, indicates that you are attempting to protect yourself from your emotions and/or actions. Viewing them on a movie screen projects them onto another person and thus makes those feelings/actions distant . You may be protecting yourself from experiencing them.

V. Help
To dream that you are calling or signaling for help, suggests that you are feeling lost, overwhelmed, and/or inadequate.

VI. Church
To dream that you are in a church, suggests that you are seeking for some spiritual enlightenment and guidance. You are looking to be uplifted in some way. Perhaps you have made some mistakes in the past which have set you back on your path toward your goals. With proper support, you will get on the right track again. Alternatively, it may also mean that you are questioning and debating your life path and where it is leading. You are reevaluating what you want to do.

VII. Window
To see windows in your dream, signifies bright hopes, vast possibilities and insight.

VIII. Mug/Cup
To see a broken cup in your dream, denotes feelings of powerlessness, guilt and/or low self-esteem. Perhaps you feel unqualified or inadequate in dealing with a situation.

Yeah, so obviously I am one messed up person... :P

-Crys

Ramblings...

Wed, 26 Apr 2006 22:26:05 GMT

___________________________

I've been thinking quite a bit lately, mainly about how much I've changed in the past year. Looking back, I've gained more confidence in myself and just being me. That's something I never had...I've always felt a bit out of place in society. Many of my morals and such are quite different than the mass, and as such I always felt like an outcast in life, and yet not. That probably makes little to no sense, but its the truth of the matter.

So now I find myself almost ninteen and finally able to feel comfortable in my own skin. I find it sort of sad that just now I've finally reached this point, but at least it happened. :)

And when it comes to love, I constantly used to get thrown into fits of depression over the silliest things. I'm happy that I've finally come to terms with everything, and my reactions aren't as strong as they once were. But, geesh...I'm getting tired of the "You aren't crying, are you?" comment from my family! Grr...yes, I am sensitive, but I will not break! College has been both good and bad for me, in this sense...it has forced me to mature and gain more independence than I would have had otherwise.

On another note, my cell broke...well, not the actual phone itself, but the antenna. I was mostly joking around at dinner with a friend, when I called the phone 'stumpy'...so now it's a bit of a joke. Imagine someone overhearing, "Where the heck are you stumpy?" as I'm looking in my backpack for my cell. I can just imagine the odd looks shooting my way! :P Hahaha!

-Crys

Head Bang

Wed, 26 Apr 2006 18:19:06 GMT

_______________________________

Yes, head bang!

I'm beginning to wonder if my fanfic project will ever get off the ground...it's taking me so long to just get my ideas on paper and out there. Well, truthfully, it would have been out a few weeks ago, I had a 29 page chapter all written and everything, but my wonderful beta gave it to me straight, alerting me that in my haste, the character development and characterization was horrendous. And in general, the plot was moving entirely too fast, it needed to be slowed down.

So, I went back to the drawing board and after bouncing ideas off of her, the plot is now more developed. Ha-ha, you plot holes, I will beat you! :P I'm happy the plot is more worked out, then it originally was. In fact, so many details were altered, I discarded a lot of my original ideas in favor of better ones...and I actually have started the blasted chapter, but it's taking me so long. I'm up to 18 pages now...and yet, I feel my writing may be a bit too descriptive, that whereas my pace was too hasty originally, maybe now its too slow.

Oh, well...I will continue to work and hope ALD will make an appearance soon! :)

-Crys

Creative Juices

Fri, 14 Apr 2006 06:34:14 GMT

____________________________

I think I'm seriously going to die!

Okay, well...not really. But I'm starting to think that it is a very bad idea to even consider going a long stretch of time without doing something artistic or creative. I first started writing fanfiction back in 2003 with a story called 'Get a Clue, Would ya!' but I lost my enthusiasm after a while. Looking back I can honestly say that I was approaching everything wrong. I started writing because I thought it was cool that people could post these extravagant stories and that they got all this feedback. I posted for the reviews mainly, they gave me a thrill, made me happy.

However, recently I've had a change of heart. I have so many ideas that I want to write...only this time I intend to write them because I want to, not for reviews or anything else. I just want to tell a story, to the best of my ability. I know I'm not that great a writer, but I hope to improve as time goes by. I'll try my best and my best will be good enough for me. ^_^

Eh...but it's quite ridiculous! Every time I close my eyes to go to sleep, another idea pops into my head, either for my current project or for another one. At this rate, I'll have a whole league of projects lined up for when I finish the current one, and the first one hasn't even made it out yet...

Current Project:
-Assume Love Dead *Mir/San, slight Inu/Kag*

Will it never end?! Gah...kill me now...

-Crys